Rattlesnakes for Sale
There's nothing that says "That crazy murder cult is after me!" like a rattlesnake in your enemy's mailbox, but rounding up those snakes was always such a tiresome chore. But fear not! Save many hours of weary labor by purchasing your scaly weapons of vengeance through Rattlesnakes for Sale, and those tiresome investigative journalists, IRS agents, and defecting cultists will soon be running for cover!